If divorce is on the table, discernment counseling can help you come to healthier decisions.
If you or your partner are unsure whether to stay in the relationship or perhaps go your separate ways, discernment counseling may be an appropriate option.
Discernment Counseling - Making Decisions From A Healthier Place
Discernment counselors assist couples that are ambivalent about staying married or getting divorced. This can be a difficult phase for a couple who has reached a point where divorce is on the table. It can occur where one or both individuals may be struggling with the relationship and need help deciding on whether they should continue through with a divorce or if there is any way the relationship can be salvaged. It is not uncommon for one person to be “leaning out” while the other is “leaning in.” One may feel that couples therapy can help, while the other is nearly checked out. This can present some challenges to a happy reunion, but discernment counseling can still be an incredibly valuable process even if the couple differs in their desire to remain together.
Relationships usually share a significant amount of care and love. In most cases, both parties may have placed a considerable amount of time and effort into their relationships. However, once the relationship reaches the point where a divorce is under consideration, the marriage is usually under a significant amount of stress whether the individuals are aware of it or not. Stress and anxiety in a relationship do not always appear as frustration or problems in communication, but can sometimes present as discontentment, depression, or increasing distance between partners. In any event, this can be a difficult stage for couples since they may be troubled by events or persisting emotions which have led them to consider terminating the relationship. This can happen following years of conflict, after emotional or value differences change, or after a single event such as an unexpected affair has come to light.
The resulting fallout may lead one or both individuals to remain distressed about losing their relationship. In addition, concerns regarding how their next steps may affect their children, what parenting arrangements may need to be defined, what financial decisions may need to be made, and what are the living arrangements they may need to consider during this process can weigh heavily on the relationship. Couples often rush to make these decisions from unhealthy or painful emotional spaces. They often fail to consider the extended impact their emotionally-driven decisions may have in the long term or even how their decisions may be rooted over several psychological factors which may lead them to preemptively terminate a union before a more grounded decision process can take place.
Make conscious decisions, not emotional ones.
Discernment therapy helps you manage uncertainties and reach viable solutions or conclusions.
Call Your Discernment Counselor Before Your Lawyer
Once a divorce is under consideration, most couples run to their respective family attorneys to gain a perspective or advice on a very big, and often permanent decision. Couples who place such a large decision on a mediator or on someone who will try to fight for them on their behalf may be jumping too far ahead in their process. We certainly support legal counseling, but we strongly recommend that couples explore a discernment process before any final decisions are made. This could save a struggling couple a significant amount of costs, heartache, and stress.
Even if the couple decides to move ahead with a divorce, many individuals later struggle with co-parenting or moving into healthy new relationships. Data on second and third marriages suggests that new marriages fare significantly worse than their first marriage. This may suggest that while the problems may currently seem overwhelming, exploring a reunion or a healthier split may leave individuals better prepared to manage conflict in the future. As relational beings, we tend to work in patterns and can often harbor anger, resentment, or mistrust in future relationships if these feelings are not explored. This is neither caring for your own process nor for a new individual with whom you may want to eventually carry a relationship.
What is different about Love Discovery Institute?Unlike most clinics and therapists that focus on symptom relief, our therapists deliver specialized treatments which aim to ameliorate our concerns at the heart of the problem. Through this process, we gain insight, identify patterns, and improve our understanding of our psychological defenses which may affect our life and our relationships. This also promotes long-term change and keeps us from the cyclical problems that can otherwise consume our world. Through the process of our highly-focused therapies, our therapists will generally help individuals explore their past, show them how it lives in the present, and outline a plan to move forward in healthier, more authentic, and more loving ways.
What type of therapies do you offer?Whether you are seeking individual or couples therapy, we believe that at our core, we are relational beings. We experience life around others and integrate healing and connection through this very lens. Although we offer a wide spectrum of modalities including humanistic, integrative, psychodynamic, analytic, existential, narrative, and various cognitive behavioral therapies, we've adopted these orientations around the relational space. In addition, within these frameworks, we incorporate a number of tools or interventions that help support healing, promote growth, and redefine our narratives. Finding a therapist does not have be hard. Our we proudly offer our services throughout Miami-Dade including Miami, Coral Gables, Brickell, Doral, Pinecrest, and Miami Beach. We also offer Telehealth mental health services throughout Florida.
Do you take insurance?Yes. We are in-network with the following insurance providers: • United (Oscar, Optum) • Aetna (Oxford) If you have coverage with other insurance providers, you may still have significant coverage. If you carry a PPO insurance plan, you may qualify for up to 75% of your sessions to be reimbursed by your insurance company. If your therapist does not take coverage, it may be because they may focus specialized treatments. Insurance provides quality access to medication management or generalized treatments, but once a certain level of care is desired, insurance companies may not cover it. To help explain this, you may find that your nearby service-center can manage your car's oil change, but if you have an electrical problem, you'll need to take your vehicle to specialist or the vehicle's dealership. Similarly, you may go to the local salon chain, but you may not go there if you are attending a wedding. Depending on the situation, therapy may require a more experienced level of care. Saving a marriage or dealing with an infidelity requires an extremely delicate touch. It is critical that matters like these are best addressed with the help of an expert. Other reasons why some may choose to self-pay or use their out-of-network policy: • Insurance companies often want the clinical notes about your sessions. We strongly believe that thoughts, emotions, behaviors, and your personal disclosures should be kept solely between you and your therapist. If you don't want third-parties knowing business, you may want to self-pay or opt to use your out-of network coverage. • Insurance companies attempt to pay as little as possible for your care. Every session is essentially an expense against their revenue generated by your premium. Unfortunately, this forces providers to take on a broad variety of cases and discourages therapists from specialize in any one area. In order to make ends meet, therapist also have to take on extremely high caseloads which affects their ability to effectively treat, conceptualize cases, continue their education, or even manage their own self-care. This ultimately can have a huge impact on your care. • Insurance companies direct the terms of your care. They are notorious for shortening or limiting treatment. They may force a therapeutic alteration which can force you to switch therapist even after you've developed a strong therapeutic relationship with them. When you need them most, you may find that after a certain number of sessions, your insurance company may decide what is best for you. • Some treatments are limited or are simply not covered by insurance policies. For example, sex therapy is generally not covered. Although sex is deeply intertwined into our emotional and psychological functioning, insurance companies may only cover the medical aspect.
How can therapy help?Therapy is for everyone! Having a neutral, but supportive figure in your life helps you identify your blindsides and attain more love and equanimity. An experienced therapist can help you process your emotions, review your past, outline your future, and develop strong and effective skills to address any challenges you may face. Just like a coach helps an athlete optimize their game, a therapist can help you optimize your life. • Improve relationships and interpersonal communication. • Learn about your family dynamics and see how they affect your current relationships. • Identify unhealthy patterns and behaviors in your life. • Learn new tools to solve everyday or longstanding problems. • Process and heal from difficult emotions and/or events. • Grow into a more grounded and authentic being. • Raise your emotional IQ and improve your influence and connection. • Learn how to manage life transitions. • Find more purpose and love in your life.
How long does therapy take?Therapy is a process and can vary in time and scope. Like beginning a new workout or dietary regimen, results are highly unlikely after a couple of sessions. It will take time to see results. Your openness, level of commitment, and work in-between your sessions will help you accelerate your progress. If this is your first time, give yourself at least 3 months of weekly sessions to get your feet wet. Some individuals find relief, support, or stabilize a critical event that may have occurred within their relationship. Therapeutically, this only scratches the surface but allows for a strong foundation to begin to take place. Therapies lasting over 3 months really begin to go more in-depth. By this time, the therapeutic relationship fosters trust and the necessary content for individuals to step into a new realm. If you've been doing your work, you'll be building on concepts and putting things into place. Depending on your particular situation, changes may vary. Some situations such as infidelities, those on the brink of a separation, or those who have experienced a traumatic events tend to need at least this much time to begin seeing change. Many individuals enter and remain in therapy for many months or even years. They keep their therapist in their pocket and continue to embrace personal healing or growth. Individuals extending therapy for longer periods fine-tune their life experience and can become masters of their world. Mileage does vary, but significant changes should be expected.
Are my sessions confidential?Your sessions are completely confidential and are maintained between you and your therapist. We know how sensitive our thoughts and behaviors can be and believe that all conversations and feelings are welcomed. Although there are some limits to confidentiality, such as potential harm to self or others, abuse of children or vulnerable populations, we encourage everyone to talk about what is going on in their life. Don't worry, we've heard it all.
How do I get started?You can simply click on the appointments tab to see the price and availability of each provider. Select a slot and we'll email you our intake forms which can all be filled online. This process generally only take 5-10 minutes to complete. This will also give you access to our online portal where you can access your records and billing documents. All of your information are kept on a HIPPA-secured platform which uses multi-layered encryption designed to keep your information safe. Alternatively, you may also call us at 305-605-LOVE and speak to someone in the office. We can help make recommendations or help you come to an informed decision.
Are you and your partner in need of Discernment Counseling? Contact Us!
Love Discovery Institute offers Discernment Counseling in a safe and non-judgmental environment. In Discernment Counseling, you do not have to be sure if you want to stay in the marriage or not and there is no pressure to make a specific decision. However, through the process, you and your partner will gain more clarity and define what is best for you both or your family from a healthier place. Talk with one of our experienced discernment therapists, set up your first appointment, and begin your journey with us. We will help you in making confident choices in your marriage or relationship. We’re here to support you and create the best life possible.
If you are ready to get started with discernment counseling, make an appointment with any of our therapists today.
Still unsure if discernment counseling is for you? Call us at 305-605-LOVE for a free consultation.