A relationship breakup can be one of the most traumatic experiences in life. Since you are the only one experiencing the loss, it can be difficult to feel that others are relating to your hurt even though they may be sympathetic to your situation. Moreover, your grief may feel minimized because so many have experienced similar loss before.
Nonetheless, this should not take away from the process you need to work through in order to heal from a breakup and prepare for the future.
Table of Contents
6 Most Practical Steps to Healing From a Breakup
Take Time to Reflect
Work on your Self-care
Educate Yourself on Breakups
Engage with Supportive People
Set Firm Boundaries
Be Okay with Being Alone
6 Most Practical Steps to Healing From a Breakup
Take Time to Reflect
In the process of healing from a breakup, chances are you’ll be analyzing what went wrong or what you could have done differently. This is okay to an extent, but healthy boundaries must be set. You may never get the answer you desire from your ex-partner so it is not helpful to seek it from them.
What you can do to get over the heartbreak is look at your part in the relationship, both good and bad. You can consider things such as:
What did you offer when things were going well?
What did it look like when it seemed to fall apart?
Is there a way you can put yourself in the shoes of your partner to look at your own behavior?
Once you have journaled and processed some of this, you can then use it as a tool to learn. After that, set it aside and forgive yourself.
Work on your Self-care
This approach to healing from a breakup can come in many forms and vary based on your individual needs. For instance, you may listen to music to heal your sadness, work out your anger, or talk to friends or family about your pain.
Essentially, It is a time to look within on how you can look after yourself, which may mean going back to basics such as drinking 8 glasses of water a day, modifying your diet, or establishing a cleaning routine. Always keep in mind that anything you do for self-improvement is self-care, and its greatest benefit is that it offers a way to distract and heal from a long-term relationship breakup in a healthy way.
Educate Yourself on Breakups
There is a wealth of knowledge available to help you heal after a breakup. It is advisable to look for books, and articles, or even reach out to relationship experts for guidance. All these avenues can guide you to identify familial patterns that are contributing to how your relationships unfold, both current and in the past.
Overall, by taking responsibility and doing the work, there is hope for discovery and change.
Engage with Supportive People
Family and friends can help you get over heartbreak, but make sure you recognize their limits as well. You may find that professional help from therapists may be more appropriate or useful, and may provide a more neutral and long-lasting perspective. They can also point out deeper patterns of behavior or thinking that contributed to a broken relationship so that future relationships are healthier and happier.
Set Firm Boundaries
If the relationship is over, on and off again behavior can make it difficult to get over the heartbreak. Set boundaries with your previous partner and adhere to them as much as possible. Some of the ways you can heal from a breakup by setting clear and firm boundaries include:
Limiting exposure and access via social media
Deleting your ex-partner’s phone number if it's tempting to call
Pick up new hobbies and habits to distract yourself so as not to reach out
Of course, it is painful and difficult to endure but the alternative can be quite self-destructive. Especially if you see your ex engaged in a new relationship while you are still healing after the breakup. Moreover, it will also limit your potential for a successful relationship in the future.
Be Okay with Being Alone
When you are single and alone you get to remind yourself that you are valuable since you do not need a partner or someone else’s approval to make you feel complete. Additionally, you can reflect on the standards you want in a future partner. From this point, you can decide if those you cross paths with meet those expectations instead of choosing to settle with someone who is not the right fit. Another benefit is that you will learn to trust yourself to solve problems which can be crucial to restoring your confidence when healing after a breakup.
Conclusion
The most important thing to remember in the process of healing after a breakup is that you will survive. Each day may be painful, but with each passing day, it will also become easier. Essentially, you will become closer to the person you want to be and manifest the right relationship.
Love Discovery Institute is an elite emotional and cognitive wellness center focusing on intimacy, relationships, and self-discovery. Bringing together South Florida’s leading professionals in the field, the institute incorporates a holistic approach to treating the mind, body, and soul through individual, adolescent, family, and couples therapy.