Trust is an avenue to connect individuals to themselves and those around them. Trusting yourself is difficult–but rewarding. It’s the foundation of any healthy relationship including the one with yourself. Trusting oneself builds up your confidence, decisions are that much easier to be made which can result in a reduction of stress levels. The good news is that you can learn to trust yourself and your partners, family members, etc.
Many times we bring our focus to "how do I trust other people?" Assuming that "trust issues" is external rather than internal. Let's challenge that idea.
Read the statements below and notice which, if any/all, resonate with you:
1. I second guess decisions before I make them
2. I tend to overthink everything
3. I trust others opinions more than my own
4. I seek advice/opinions from others before making a decision
5. I struggle to recognize and acknowledge my own worth
6. I compare my choices with those around me
We learn how to trust and sometimes, unfortunately, we learn the most when we misplace our trust. If individuals aren't working toward being trust, that mistrust will bleed into relationship. The inability to trust oneself can translate into being unable to trust others. When unable to trust others– you keep people at a distance. When people are at a distance, you're unable to be your true, authentic self. The ability to create long lasting, connected and close relationships diminishes. How could you be authentic in your relationships when you don't truly accept that authenticity?
It can feel dangerous and scary to be truly authentic with yourself and much scarier to be truly authentic with other people. People have let you down, they've disappointed you. But when you're not allowing others in, living guarded, not accepting yourself– you're hindering yourself and your life experience.
So, I challenge you to show up for yourself. Try to notice those difficult moments. When are you feeling the lack of trust? In yourself? In those around you. Explore the different avenues that may pop up for you. Open the dialogue up to your partners. Ask them how they feel about trust and trusting themselves. Allow yourself to fully experience the joy and fun of life and be your true self. Always remember to be patient with yourself and your process.